Poem for Ma's 50th Birthday

It’s different now…

I’ve moved onto the avenues of the parenthood.

The love you’ve shown for us is better understood.

Well, I say understand, but it evades this man,

How you raised me and got a degree I guess "Can

God make it happen?" wasn’t ever in your questions,

And if it was, you learned to focus on your blessings.

See mama, I always admired how you kept faith

In the midst of struggles that may have come your way.

A part of me died when Aunt Addie said goodbye,

But I looked into your eyes and you were so sure that I

Would see her again – That it comforted my spirit.

Used to wonder about God’s voice, but when you speak I hear it.

And, I’m trying to stay on topic, but the fact of the matter,

Is that your life has truly pointed me up the ladder,

Straight to God’s graces. When we don’t think we can make it.

We give you a call and you reassure us where our place is.

Your whole essence – I mean career and all

Is centered on the question “what can I do for ya’ll?”

I try to follow the pattern and be more selfless.

But, that’s one of the areas I still need help with.

But your grandson is helping, you’ve shown that we’re destined

To fight the good fight and use love as our weapon.

So, in this world of education where everyday’s a work day.

We gotta stop and say Happy 50^th Birthday!

We love you, ma!

Mindspray...

"I don't know how to start this..." - Nas

It is October 1st and I am down in Myrtle Beach for my LB's wedding. It's kinda weird, because on this very day six years ago I was marrying the woman of my dreams, Ronda Latoya Taylor. Here we are in 2011 providing well wishes to my line brother and his beautiful bride as they embark on the same journey. God is good.

Hmmm... God is good. This is a reality I've struggled with over the past year or so. I've faced some trials that made me question everything I've ever believed in. Well, there was one trial in particular that seriously got to me. On March 13, 2008 I stared into the eyes of a dying woman that I loved dearly and my world fell apart. It was the first time I truly questioned how God could be good if he allowed this to happen to my aunt.

But, I came to understand that death is a part of life. And, I was watching my aunt transition from this life to the next. I truly believe there is life after death. "If I can find in myself a desire which nothing in this world can satisfy, then my most practical conclusion is that I was made for another world" - C. S. Lewis. I do not believe that this life is all there is. My spirit and my mind tell me there's more. And, I'm thankful that my aunt was able to move into the abundance we were created for.

Through it all, I thank God for everything. I've got to do better. I've got a lot of growing to do. And, I have a young one now expecting me to show him the good life* - Blu. I truly believe this is only possible through Christ, so I've gotta do my part to stay connected.

God willing I can keep these blogs goin...

*Link contains explicit language

Baby Z - Growth...

Wow… This whole parenthood thing is still in its beginning stages of sinking in. The more I think about it, the more blessed I feel. Ronda stepped out for a few to get her hair twisted, so it was on me to feed, burb, and change Zion. Well, then, feed, burb, and change him, again. I just started thinking about how my little boy is going to grow up to be a man with his own personality and own beliefs. I can teach him my beliefs and provide an example of how to live, but he will make his own decisions.

While I was feeding him, Asher Roth’s song “His Dream” started playing on iTunes on my computer. I used that song as the backdrop when I wrote a poem for my Dad’s 50^th birthday a couple of years ago. It’s a song Asher Roth wrote about his father’s life and continuing his dad’s dreams. I just started thinking about how my Dad held me in his arms like this 29 years ago. And, over time, I grew into the man I am today. I wonder what went through my Dad’s mind as he held me as an infant. I wonder what were his dreams for my life and his. I wonder how he felt when I was a talkative elementary school kid that would carry a conversation with any person that would listen. I wonder how he felt when I became a teenager, started defying his rules, and felt like my way was the best way. I wonder how it feels to see the child that used to depend on you for everything learn to stand on his own two. Zion needs Ronda and I for everything right now. And, we plan to provide it. Part of me wants to keep him in this state of dependence, because he has given my life new meaning and purpose. But, the larger part of me is excited about his growth. He will be a beast at life!

Let's get it, Z!

It's life... we gotta kill it!

God is… and always will be…

One day...

For the last few days I've been researching 9th Wonder's work with David Banner and his involvement with Duke University. I got especially hype when I followed my sister's advice and looked up the clip of 9th and David Banner on 106 and Park. During their interview 9th referenced numerous spots in North Carolina including my hometown of WILSON. (Wide Awake received a shout out because the young lady who is featured in their new single hails from Insomnia City). So, yeah... that definitely had me hype. It's wonderful to see people getting out and pursuing their dreams as artists. God knows the world needs purposeful, committed poets and artists.

Later, I researched some information on 9th's class at Duke and found an excerpt of one of his classes where he was teaching students how to sample. I also saw a webcast from a panel discussion with Dr. Mark Anthony Neal and Dr. James Peterson about the impact of Illmatic. It was tight to see African American males passionately discuss a beloved topic like hip hop in an academic setting. I started imagining myself as a future professor teaching hip hop history classes. That would be a beautiful opportunity.

But, for now I must stay focused. I gotta handle business so that I can be hired at an area university. Then, maybe one day in the future, I'll be able to have academic conversations like 9th, Professor Neal, and Professor Peterson about one of my loves in life - hip hop music.

Maestro Knows - Episode 8 (Professor Wonder) from Maestro Knows on Vimeo.

Graduate Poem - For the Rising Seniors

We’re created with divine doses of definite potential.

Connect it with kinetic and make moves influential.

These chil’ren think we kiddin’ when we cheerin’ for our kid in

The play or the band or the game or the stands.

Everyday I demand that those grades looking grand -

Opening up doors for you and yours.

Before we make an effect, we gotta know our cause.

Maybe I just pause, cuz we playin’ again.

Not stopping to rewind where the track begins.

So, we can hear with new ears; it plays back different.

We understand better when our vision’s replenished.

So, let’s re-plan this. Even when you get damaged.

Remember who you are, and the haters can’t stand it.

So, just tell ‘em sit down. You already earned your crown.

Got a little tassel attached. And, a full gown to match.

You lookin’ sharp as a tack. Ya mind is sharp – attack!

All the ignorance left. Some don’t have that graduate plaque.

So spread that love and spread that knowledge.

You've done your thing here. It’s on to the college.

And, when you get there and those challenges pop,

I already looked into your future – you can’t be stopped!

Graduate!

The Audacity of Hope (Part One)...

This is the story of a girl – the realest thing I’ve wrote.

18 years old and her name is Hope.

As a young child, they always knew that she would float.

Help people cope… be pain’s antidote.

Well, when she was nine, hate saw her light shine.

And, it came at her with all its powers combined.

Rape is the word, but you can’t name such a crime.

You can already design its effect on her mind.

She tried to move on and shake those skeletons,

Or, convince herself that nothing went wrong.

But, evils came back and pillaged Hope’s home.

Her name she still owned but her mind was all gone.

Men in her life had taught that her worth

Lied in her ability to do physical work.

No need for intelligence, the body comes first.

Continually submersed in waters so perverse.

She gets popularity giving away charity.

Students get a laugh. She’s the source of hilarity.

They believe they read her life with such clarity.

Truth is a rarity. There lies a disparity.

Between what they see and what she wants to be.

But, she doesn’t know how to get from A to B.

She prays for help, but change comes slowly.

She feels so lowly. What is her destiny?

Well, she’s 18 and this is her report.

Change was conceived, but she decided to abort.

Prolly from the sorts of people that resort.

To taking Hope and calling her Ho for short.

The Audacity…

The Downfall (Audio/Video Version)...

I made a short audio/video file to go with my last post. I think I'm going to start podcasting these...